My Jobs

I'm probably over educated but enjoyed my OND and HND courses, due to not being a great communicator which is really required for professional jobs especially programming. I didn't enjoy University the workload was to heavy and I didn't have a great interest in much of the subject. So I have had a number of lesser jobs that don't fully use my intellect:

My first job was washing up in a Hotel in Whitby when 17.

When in Canada in 1990 I got a job near Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada picking Cherries. After much walking around asking for work with a very heavy backpack. Southern Ontario is surprisingly warm. The ladders were about 9 feet tall. The term Cherry Picking derives from it being easy to pick 90% of Cherries, but the remaining 10% are in difficult to get to or out of the way places. They have a machine that shakes the Cherry trees base to collect them, but it only gets 90% of them, and the tree dies a lot sooner because it's roots get disturbed. I didn't make much money, but got a free bed in the barn and enjoyed the fresh air and sun. I also got to go round with the boss at times picking up the full Cherry Baskets and putting them in boxes of water about 1 metre per side. They were then processed in a factory on site and taken away in a big Juggernaut (from the Ancient Middle Eastern Hittite Empire, 2nd millennium B.C., wheeled chariots with spearmen, the cutting edge of military technology for it's day).

During University holidays 2003 I did piece work fruit picking, Apples and Strawberries (though on your back) near Maidstone, Kent (the Garden of England). That paid about Ł2/hour if you were lucky going at my rather sedate pace. You also had to live in a camp site, which I didn't mind but I didn't get on with some of the characters there. Some were OK. The Ukrainians worked at double my speed and never bruised a Apple unlike me, you have to pick them with the palm of your hand not your fingers but I couldn't get the knack of it. There were a lot of veggies there and they did like their wacky-backy. I only tried it twice, and all it gave me was the munchies and lathery. You also have to smoke tobacco with it. One up for Colonization! One guy there Ross was 1/2 Jewish (his Father) and 1/2 Catholic. His Father owned a Pig Farm in Boulder, Colorado. I town whose water supply is derived from a Glacier. Consequently he became a vegetarian, and switched me over from using lard to vegetable oil for cooking. The veggies got very upset when I used their frying pan for cooking meat. You can find these types of Jobs in Summer Jobs UK is Youth Hostel Shop or on the internet. Most of them continued to claim unemployment benefit. A lot more difficult now as you have to fill out a book of the jobs you have applied for each week.
After I got fired for bruising Apples (Spartans to be precise, Macintosh after which the Apple Macintosh is named after a fruit picking job by Steve Jobs) so went to a near by farm factory that was processing hop vines. Most of the loaders (a heavy lifting job) were on Hash (Cannabis), you can't get the staff. One's Mother didn't mind the drug but objected to him taking it with Tobacco. The Hop Vines are grown on great telephone type poles and our 12 feet long. Once on the hooks, a conveyor took then to be shaken by a machine so the hops would come of the vines. They then came out onto a conveyor of rollers with gaps in them for the hops to fall through. My job was to use a wooden stick to stop the vines winding round the rollers, and cut them off with a knife while the machine was still working if I could. If not I had to stop the machine and cut the vine or string myself. The vines then went out to be cut up, and the hops were feed into sacks. I got very tired at the end of a shift and had to live in a tent.

After University, 2004, I went on a Raspberry picking holiday near Colchester, Essex. The capitol of Queen Boudicca's Kingdom which lead a rebellion to the Roman's in 61 A.D. (the Year of our Lord) and burnt Londinium (London) to the ground as it was left unprotected. The rebellion was crushed and the Kingdom put under total Roman Rule. I statue of Boudicca remains just round the corner from Parliament by the Thames. There was also a Roman Colonia, a home for retired Veteran Legionaries ready to be called up in the event of a Rebellion, and given a plot of land each. Raspberry picking leaves little holes in you fingers. Most of the workers were foreign students over to learn English. I went mainly to get away from the grotty Housing Estate in Oxford I had to live in.

Just before Christmas I got a job in a factory that made Infra-Red Hand-driers, and door edge detectors. My job was to the straighten or add components like Capacitors and Infra-Red LED's using a soldering iron. I used blue-tac to hold the components in place and this was often returned to me by the ATM test machine operator as I forgot to remove it. We had a fan that took away the soldering fumes. I also checked returned boards. The boss insisted on us listening to BBC Radio 1 at full blast so it was too noisy to talk to anyone. you also had to share a bench which I didn't like. And worked 10 hours a day, 4 days a week. I never saw the Sun for half the week as it was the winter. And commuting time on two buses meant I only had about 2 hours free time a day. I went in a Saturday Mornings which were a lot more mellow. I didn't really have any friends there so left. The pay was OK. I worked down stairs as well making springs and wiring up the hand-dryer.

I then signed up with an employment agency and got a terrible job in a Warehouse. Well I didn't mind the job it was the people I had to work with. They only paid Ł3/hour, at least now they have to pay the minimum wage. Forklift drivers got Ł6/hour. Basically they made up special offers for supermarkets like two Coffees for the price of one, of a Milkshake package, or lunch boxes with Cheese (someone once cut their finger and left blood on it) and the one where the real Neanderthals (many former criminals, and illegal immigrants, that's what keep supermarket and ready meal prices down) worked putting four bottles in a cardboard collar. I'm sure a Robot or Industrial machine could be developed to do this. All they did all day was put four bottles in the collar and put it on the conveyor belt. 'Abandon Hope All Yee Who Enter Here'. You could see it in the eyes of some of them. The Boss was always coming alone telling you to work faster, and you had to take a note of how many boxes you had processed each hour. There was also a machine to shrink wrap plastic packaging onto products.
They also sent me to a better warehouse were I worked with a Welsh guy taking a welding course and telescopic forklifts. They had a stock of alcohol cans that reached the roof and went all the way back in the warehouse. There must have been millions of cans there.
And one where you put stickers on catalogues, assembled different sheets of paper together, packed computer games, made up little bottles of alcohol (I had to cut open each individual alcohol packet at speed), and a machine for putting the metal middles in ring binders. Some of this was done on a conveyor belt. You have to keep up with the machine, thanks to Henry Ford, mass production reduces prices but doesn't make for a fun job. I took one empty box and but it in the recycle bin and it turned out it was needed to repackage the games, by this time it was 2/3 of the way down.

I also worked as a development engineer. I wasn't much good a PCB design, being a bit dyslexic. I looked up the components on a CD and made a component list. The plotter used a see through pen which couldn't produce line dark enough so the PCB's wouldn't develop. So that bit wasn't my fault.

Mechanical and PCB (Printed Circuit Board) assembly and soldering of Gas Detectors. This paid about Ł10,500 + holidays + pension. The job involved making batches of about 20, 50 or 100 circuits from templates some where very complicated and took days to complete. I didn't mind the job but didn't really get on with most of the people in the factory although some were very kind and decent. There was guy I particularly hated for quite legitimate reasons I won't go into who came each and every day to have lunch with us even though he knew he was in the wrong. I had to put up with him as there was no where else to eat not even any benches in the Industrial Park due to Thatcherism false economies which make for bigger turn over of labour due to poor working environments. We did the crossword at Lunchtime. I stayed there 1 1/2 years, but the environment made me rather nervous especially at break time when I was trying to work with everyone staring in my direction, there were three separate 15 minute breaks in a row as there was very little canteen space. There was one guy who I worked next to who couldn't read due to problems with his brain but who could read a circuit diagram very easily and made money on the side making and selling Music Amplifiers. He also had a computer that could speak text for him, and a milling machine in his flat! He was very fast at his job but kept his bench in a very dirty state. They brought in one device that I nick-named the iron-maiden. It shone a light on the next component to be inserted, and then went immediately on to the next one. Built to infuriate the user. The boss of our department left and was replaced by someone I hadn't got on with, so I was unable to go back or get a proper reference.

And programmed a Psion Computer to read data from a battery monitoring circuit. Made up of two microcontrollers per battery (one to transmit data down a fibre optic link, and the other to read the data). The Y2K bug has not yet hit Psion as their clock measures from the time the first computer went on line about 1980 I think in seconds. So will crash about 2046. I also installed a unit for a bank battery back-up system in Manchester. And tested the individual units which were made elsewhere. The job description was very fuzzy and I didn't get on very well with the boss, due to deference.

I've tested and reworked Psion Palmtop computers using a 400 degree C hot air gun which I had to share. SMT is tiny components that drive you mad trying to solder, assembled by robot pick-and-place machines, which always seem to leave a few loose components. It generally meant replaced the MAX233 chip which blew-up very easily. I also used a ATE (Automatic Test Equipment) machine, which ID'ed bad components which you simply had to change. Also there is no Psion 4, only 3 and 5 as 4 is unlucky in China. The factory was designed by some sadistic bastard in such a way as to have some one staring at you no matter what direction you looked. With a big glass partition between areas and open plan everywhere. If it had been divided into offices I would have been a lot more comfortable. But the company obviously preferred a extremely high turn over of labour which cost them a fortune in Agency fees. Only paying me Ł4.50/hour for technical work. The Agency probably got paid Ł9/hour + a bonus when the worker went permanent. This meant only the most unpleasant workers tended to stay. The boards may have gone un-repaired after I left, leading to big looses for the company, and un-environmentalism. One test and repair guy also filled the flux pot with the wrong type of flux from the pick-and-place machine which made me ill. There was also a shortage a chairs and soldering irons. And the industrial estate again had no where to sit to have your lunch, and you only got 1/2 hour anyway.

I also worked in factory making Medical Ventilators using a Microcontroller (I did this as my University Final Year Project), a lot of Pneumatic equipment, some SMT and normal soldering (the boards were assembled by another company as was some of the wiring but needed ), and some wiring up (using hand crimp tools which really hurt, they should have got a mechanical operated one). I assembled and tested the units on Pneumatic, Electrical and Soak Test. I've built an electronic test set for this and another job. This job paid Ł13,300 + holidays + pension. But no one talked to each other which made for a very uncomfortable environment; and I wanted to work on a Text Adventure game (which took a Year to write on and off, plus looking after my allotment); so I left.

After this I went on the drug to improve my self confidence which made me a lot more employable. Unfortunately I had few good references, and had either worked or gone to interviews at just about every Electronics Company in my part of Oxfordshire.

I found a temporary job at RM (Research Machines) who make (school) PC's on a production line making computers - you had to work fast but they did have a good canteen. I put in network, graphics, modem and other cards; and putting on their stickers. I also plugged in connectors for a computer test of the base unit. I had to stand all the time which got to the legs after a bit. Many of the workers were University students on their holidays. They also had flexi-time for working Mothers. They through away a lot of stuff including anti-static bags which I collected and sold on the internet for 10p each. They gave us a video on not dropping base units as it might damage the Hard disk drive. I wasn't fast enough to keep up with the line. Other people took apart the PC's to remove broken components and repair them. I also worked on the line to put the PC's into boxes. They had a mechanical arm to load them but it was broken, so they just put them on four bit of circular tape as a make do including an Ł8,000 server.

So I went to Paterson's Employment Agency, which gave me a fair go, although their rates were 50p less than the other Agency. They sent me on Warehouse Work, Washing-Up and Cleaning. You go where they send you, and if it works out you stay if you find it enjoyable / comfortable, and if not you try somewhere else. There was this one warehouse where they expected you to work really fast, and if you didn't you were fired a the end of the day. Some African Immigrant worked his guts out, probably because it was the only work he could get, wouldn't be entitled to benefits, and had no work in his home country.

I have had jobs in the electronics industry. PCB (Printed Circuit Board) assembly jobs are easy to do by anyone with a modicum of intelligence. This is better paid better and had a pension and days off. Agencies have now been forced to give days off. I didn't mind doing the job. I have a meticulous suitable to the job, you just sorted and put the components in a carasol under your workbench, they came in little resealable bags, place them on the spot indicated by silk screen layout and take them to the cropping machine. Why they couldn't make components with short leads and save component wire and cropping I don't. When I did my computer job form at school where you tick all the boxes saying what you like and are good at it recommended I should be a type setter, so this was a very similar job really. The circuit board with components was then put through the flow soldering machine, a skilled job and came back for re-work. Straightening any off components with a Soldering Iron. It's easy to learn soldering all you have to do is hold the iron against the wire for 5 seconds then apply the solder, made of a tin-lead-flux compound. You need to know how to read a component list and recognise a component but basic Electronics at school can teach you this. IC's had to go through a hand forming machine otherwise they wouldn't fit. Again why can't they make formed at the right angle already? Resistors also went through a hand forming machine which you clamped to your desk. Mechanical forming machine are available for large quanties of components which our attached together by something similar to masking tape which falls off with the cut leads. Electrolytic Capacitors and Resistors are generally the only components treated in this way. Most PCB assemblers are Women yet no Girls never seem to study Electronics which would have helped them learn the Job.

I had to do a computerised questionnaire while at school that advised you on the job you where most suitable for. It came up with type-setting (now done by computers but once manual) which is similar to PCB assembly.

If you are at all interested in electronics check out the Website I maintained for the now defunct British Amateur Electronics Club. Before computers and the internet everyone made simple electronics circuits. They sure like their Microcontrollers: a miny single chip programmable computers of which my final year University project was about. The code was OK (a term Billy Bunter questions coming from America now in very popular use, thanks party to Windows, but once regarded as rather vulgar). But I couldn't get it to work I either staticed it or didn't programme the lock-up address for the first line of Machine Code correctly, I used an interface in BASIC attached to a PC to drive a little slotted wheel driven by a stepper motor and SAA1024 stepper motor driver chip, an infra-red send-receive LED-transceiver-transistor which slotted in between the wheel and some debounced buttons using a Schmitt Trigger Chip also invented by Bell Labs.